Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Things Change Part Five: "Festina Lente"

"Make haste slowly."

While thinking about a title for this blog entry, I remembered this English phrase, and when I Googled it, I got a number of hits, many relating to the Roman Emperor Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus, as well as the Latin version of the phrase, "Festina Lente". The meaning of the phrase is basically that things in life should be done "with a proper balance of urgency and diligence", to quote Wikipedia.

I've been giving a lot of thought to this concept recently, and trying to stick to it. With the major changes in my life begun by the realizations described in "Things Change" Part One, I have been re-evaluating many aspects of my life, and trying to keep the good ones, ditch the bad ones, and forge a new way forward that will be better for me and for my loved ones, especially my wife.

I have this great sense of urgency to do the right things, while also trying to make up for my past errors. It is a useful motivating force, and I am glad it is there, but I am finding that it is leading me to become a bit too impatient with seeing those necessary changes made, and their effects to be felt. What I am discovering is that there are things that can be changed within days (and I have done some of those), some within weeks (and I've done a few of those too), but some of these changes will take months and maybe even years. I need to relax and take things at the proper pace. It's difficult, and occasionally painful and frustrating, but I really do want -- and need -- to do this right. -- PL


Adam Riches said...

As they say, "Rome wasn't built in a day". The fact that you are conscious of the things that were previously making you unhappy, and taking the necessary steps to rectify those things will pay off for you in the long run, I'm sure.

And if you want to get even more cliché ridden, "good things come to those who wait" :-)

Though speaking personally, patience has never been much of a virtue, whenever I decide to make a life-altering change. So I can certainly empathize.

Anonymous said...

Life is sometimes uncomfortable, sort of like being pulled through a chain-link fence; before and after things are fine, it's only during the transition from one side of the fence to the other that it becomes difficult. Right now you're undergoing a metamorphosis of sorts where you're leaving your old "body" behind and changing into a new one. What that new form of yours will be exactly, isn't known just yet. In time though, you will assume that next form and things will be easier as the anticipation of waiting will have past. Keep being you though, and doing the things that you love to do (drawing, etc..) and it will help the time go more smoothly. :-)

From Mary's Pen said...

Mr. Laird, I am new to reading your blog, by just a few weeks. I've caught up with many older entries, skimming through and delighting in learning more of the background behind my favorite characters of all time. It has been an honor, Sir, to get to "know" you just a little through these glimpses of your life.

I commend you for having the courage to face the changes that you need to make for yourself, and to move forward. It's not easy to admit when we need to change, and it's a thousand times harder to go through the process, to stick to it even when the going gets hard and the path seems uncertain.

For what it's worth, I am praying for you and your family. May God go with you as you journey.

Rejoicing in the day,

Neil Vitale said...


Up untill a few posts ago, I had no idea you had depression issues...but this sentance got too me : >>>I have this great sense of urgency to do the right things, while also trying to make up for my past errors. >>

I'm feeling the same way. The last 6 years I've been on high stress alert. Started with doggie death, death of a marriage (parents) and ended with a grandfather death. Nothing but death and stress that has lead too a few online and offline scuffles that shouldn't have otherwised happen...It also doesn't help that you don't have anyone in your own age group who have time too hang out and give you a bit of an escape..

Curious as too how you tend to deal with it udring downtime or quieter moments?

Tyr Germanic said...

Good post,its smart of you to try to think of all the angles.

Its like they say,"Patience is a virtue."but they also say "The waiting is the hardest part" so i don't know what to believe.

mikeandraph87 said...

I understand your like me at a crossroads in life and trying to "carpe diem" (to keep the latin theme going and as it is relevant)though a different one its the feeling of needing to take control and then wait. It sounds like you've come a long way. Thanks for sharing. Its honor that you trust us enough to share whats in your heart. Good luck keeping it up.